27 Objectively Awful Dating Stories That’ll Have Single People Sighing In Disappointment As They Delete Hinge For The Fifteenth Time
Reddit user greenwichrunner recently asked, “What happened on the worst date you ever went on?” People quickly filled the thread with absolutely brutal, awkward, embarrassing, and uncomfortable date stories. Here’s what they so bravely shared:
1. “He watched videos on his phone the entire time. Literally as soon as we sat down with our coffees, he took out his phone and never lifted his eyes up again. He sometimes spoke to tell me to say, ‘Haha, watch this one.’ His hands were shaking, so I thought it could potentially be extreme nervousness at first. I let it slide for way too long. After the hour mark, I had had enough and had a ‘babysitter emergency.’ He then proceeded to text me to tell me he had fun (??) and he asked for a second date. It has been years, and I still wonder how his thought process worked.”
2. “He all but proposed to me. This was a first date. He had just come off a broken engagement. He had a trip to Aruba booked that was supposed to be his honeymoon with his ex. The entire date he talked about taking me to Aruba and then starting a life together. I was 21 at the time (he was 25), and I was nowhere near ready for that.”
3. “When he kissed me, he let out the biggest burp in my mouth. It was so disgusting. He thought it was hilarious.”
4. “We talked on the phone for a week before meeting up. She suggested meeting in a parking lot before heading out, for safety reasons. Cool by me. What I didn’t know at the time was that it was the parking lot to a Chuck E. Cheese’s. She brought her two kids (ages 4 and 6) with her and wanted our date to include the children at the aforementioned Rat Pizza and Child Casino. I spent two hours playing games with the kids so as not to disappoint them. After we left, I let her know that we wouldn’t be seeing each other again. Bringing your kids on a first date with a dude without informing him is just trashy. Don’t mention ‘safety’ when you’re dragging your kids along on a date with a stranger. I have absolutely no issue with dating a woman with children. Hell, my wife had two kids when we met, but at least she didn’t drag them out on our first date.”
“I felt bad for the kids in all of it. She tried to guilt-trip me by saying that her children loved spending time with me and that her previous dates never went nearly as well. So I wasn’t the first person she had pulled this on; I was just the first one who didn’t leave immediately upon seeing her with kids.”
5. “She got so drunk she pooped her pants at the party we ended up at, and I had to call her parents and have them meet me to pick her up.”
6. “When I was 23, living in NYC, I met a guy through a dating site. We met at a sushi restaurant in the Village. The conversation was easy; we laughed a lot, and there was clear chemistry. We went to grab a drink after dinner, and there was lots of leaning in close and hands on my knee, etc. It was pretty electric! We walked back towards the subway station to say goodnight. He pulled me into a doorway and kissed me deeply. We then proceeded to make out hot and heavy with some over-the-clothes groping for at least 10-15 minutes. It was hot. The date was a success, or so I thought. When we finally stepped back onto the sidewalk to say goodnight, he said, ‘You’re really cute, a great kisser, and a great guy, but I just don’t feel any chemistry between us. Take care.’ And he turned around and walked down the stairs to the subway station without another word. I was left standing there in total shock. So it was both a fantastic date AND an awful one.”
7. “Had a white supremacy tattoo. A visible one. A new one. Didn’t even stay long enough to get my drink.”
8. “We ordered oysters. He got a piece of shell in his mouth and SPIT IT ONTO THE FLOOR of the dining room…among other things.”
9. “The guy threw up in my face because he was nervous and had too much to drink on an empty stomach.”
10. “We matched online, chatted for a week, and all seemed normal. We met for coffee, and within five minutes, he launched into a rant about how his ex ruined his life, his boss was sabotaging him, and women only date men for money. Then he asked if I could spot him for the coffee because he ‘forgot his wallet’ and immediately followed it with, ‘So, what are you doing this weekend? Want to come back to my place?’ I finished my drink, paid for my own coffee, and left. Blocked him before I hit the parking lot.”
11. “He said he believed in lizard people. When I contested, he stood up, threw his chair, and screamed, ‘SOME PEOPLE SMELL LIKE SULFUR.’ He also forcefully grabbed my arm in the process of me getting up to leave. The weirdest thing about this is that this guy is a psychiatrist.”
12. “A guy tried to take me on a date to McDonald’s, which was fine, but he also only had coupons for a sandwich I did not want. So instead of him using the coupons, I got what I wanted and also paid for his meal. He never spoke to me again because he felt I made him look like ‘a bitch.'”
13. “We went to a honeybee farm in New Zealand, and when I was paying for my bee souvenir fridge magnets and postcards, the manager came over and asked him to open up his jacket and to please hand over the $120 rare manuka honey jar he had been trying to steal on the way out. I was MORTIFIED. He had the nerve to try to say he was trying to ‘stick it to the man’ when I asked why on earth he did that. Never spoke to him again.”
14. “He drove me to his ex’s house after dinner. He wanted to sit parked on the street in front of her house in the dark. Noped out of there quickly.”
15. “I was meeting someone from a dating app. She asked if it was okay to bring her roommate along when we met. I had no issue with this, and figured she would be there for introductions and making sure I was a safe person, then would go off on her own, and we’d get back to a normal date. Honestly, I thought it was a smart approach. She brought her guy roommate, who was very obviously into her, and he stayed the whole time. He would try to join the conversation only when he could talk about her and sing her praises. Not to me, mind you, but he just told her directly how awesome she was every now and then.”
16. “He got really annoyed because I was too nice to the wait staff. He reminded me that ‘they’re here to serve us.’ That was the first and last date.”
17. “I talked to a guy from Tinder for a week, and things seemed chill with good banter. He picked me up, and we went to a local pub, where we chatted about all kinds of things, including religion. He said he was Catholic, and I am Catholic too, but not overly so. As the night went on, we ended up at my place. He told me he was against premarital sex, which I respected, even though it was clear he wanted to. I kept telling him it was a bad idea, but he initiated anyway, and it happened. Not even a second afterward, he started freaking out and said, ‘What have I done? I’m going to hell.’ He left within three minutes. I obviously blocked him. A few days later, I got an unknown call, and it was his pregnant fiancé.”
18. “She asked a clerk at the pizza place I took her to out on a date, then asked me, ‘He’s pretty cute, right?'”
19. “I went to the bathroom, and she made out with another random guy on the dance floor and then tried to gaslight me that she didn’t.”
20. “He talked about himself for 90 minutes straight. I should have left after 20.”
21. “He knocked an entire pint of hard cider into my lap because he was talking with his hands, then blamed me for not dodging out of the way fast enough. I had to try to dry my pants with the hand dryer and then walk an hour to get home, reeking of stale cider, because I was too embarrassed to hail a taxi or take public transport.”
22. “Mini golf. She hit the ball so hard, it bounced off a wall and nailed a lady in the head. That was the end of that.”
23. “It was a boat ride tour of the city, and there was no AC on a 100°F day. Half the people passed out, and both he and I were drenched in sweat; we basically called it a day. There was no salvaging that.”
24. “She was swiping on Tinder during dinner, and didn’t even try to hide her phone. Made little to no conversation, and looked up a total of three times: once while ordering, once when her food got there, and once to look at me, offended when I asked for separate checks.”
25. “He answered 13 work phone calls during dinner and wondered why I wasn’t interested in meeting again.”
26. “I went on a date with a guy to Olive Garden. He brought flowers and was super cheesy. He took his napkin and tucked it into his shirt like a bib. He said over dinner that he had just gotten a divorce, he was 24, and I was 20, and was looking for someone else. Then, he said, ‘Yeah, if I were dating someone and she wanted to come back into my life, I would definitely go back with my ex.’ What the hell? I ghosted the guy after.”
