Reddit user randomzy876 recently asked, “What is the weirdest thing someone said to you after sex?” Some were honestly a bit annoying, while others were just downright weeeeird. Here’s what people revealed:

1. “‘If I could afford it, I’d pay for you to have your buttcrack raised about two inches higher. It would look a lot nicer that way. That’s all that’s missing.’ He wanted my ass crack to extend into my lower back?! 😤”

—Madeloncooks

2. “He asked, ‘Are you a cuddler?’ and I said, ‘Yeah, I like a cuddle now and then.’ He said, ‘Okay, well, I’m not,’ and rolled over. Okay, no worries; I also rolled over. A few minutes later, he said, ‘Well, you know, if you want to cuddle me, that’s fine, I guess. I suppose I don’t mind, if you really want to…'”

—roasttrumpet

3. “I had a one-night hookup with a girl I met on a rafting trip. When she left my tent, she woke me up just to say, ‘See you never,’ zipped it up, and left.”

—ClockBlock

4. “One client told me I was going to hell if I didn’t repent. He told me he already regretted our encounter and was going to repent that Sunday, so he’d be fine. But I had to stop earning money through sex and repent if I wanted to be saved.”

—to_be_viola

5. “My wife and I lost our virginity to each other. Afterwards, she said, ‘I used to be scared of dying a virgin. Now I’m just scared of dying.'”

—Jarek-of-Earth

6. “We were lying in bed afterwards when she goes, ‘Are you left-handed?’ I am not left-handed.”

—p_t_dactyl

7. “He liked it when I scratched his back after sex. No problem! Until one day, when I was doing it, he sighed and said, ‘It reminds me of my mom.’ Um. Sir.”

—acover4422

8. “Took a selfie of us right after and said, ‘This goes into my hall of fame.'”

—Tiefschlag

9. “My girlfriend went, ‘It sounded like you were giving birth.’ We still laugh about it eight years later.”

—Bitterqueer

10. “When my boyfriend and I lost our virginity to each other, the first thing he immediately said to me right after he put it inside me was, ‘USB in.'”

—Legal-Macaroon-3430

11. “‘Oh no, oh no, I have post-nut clarity. I have to go.’ True story. Obviously, I blocked him after that. I know I’m not the prettiest out there, but goddamn.”

—cgon1990

12. “‘So, your friend…is she single?’ As I was lying in bed.”

—Carlijnxoxo

13. “My first hook up. ‘I like how your nipples are big.’ They are normal-sized nipples. IDK if he had seen tits before.”

—Wonderful_Kale_7995

14. “He turned around, grabbed his iPad, and watched some political debate. Said I could leave now.”

—TobiastheConfused

15. “‘You know, our relationship is like a gallon of milk; it has an expiration date.'”

—Wyo-normie

16. “He immediately started talking about his ex.”

—Catmaster673

17. “We were walking towards each other after we were done. She reached down, grabbed my penis, did a handshake with it, and said, ‘Nice doing business with you!'”

—Jimbobway66

18. “‘Ha! I wish I could see my ex’s face.'”

—ConstantEnergy

19. “‘You feeling it now, Mr. Krabs?’ She thought it was hilarious.”

—Noxilcash

20. “She said, ‘How do we explain this to your brother if he finds out? Do we have to?’ They had dated in high school.”

—labratnc

21. “About eight or nine years ago, I was hooking up with this guy who told me he hadn’t had sex before. When we eventually did have sex, he told me, ‘Huh! That wasn’t as good as I thought it was going to be.’ I told him maybe he could have kept that comment to himself, and he was annoyed that I didn’t value his honesty.”

—ComplexFemCharacters

22. “‘I just remembered I forgot to turn off the coffee pot at work today.'”

—Starkiller_303

23. And: “‘I’d like to thank your dad and God for giving you this ass.’ Such a funny man.”

—chocomochi21